Avery Underwood

Avery Underwood

Why we need compassionate communication now more than ever

The problem with today is that we don’t listen to one another. We would rather sit in our echo chamber and stick our fingers in our ears and go LALALA rather than having an actual conversation with someone of an opposing view. And here in lies one of the biggest problems we have with society today.

When society is not well, we are not well. That is why LISTENING to one another is so important.

We brand people as too left, far right, racist, sexist… All the while shunning them from our existence because we can’t STAND them. Without realising the very real nuance that no matter what someone believes, they most probably believe a lot of different things than the “tribe” they’re branded to.

This means we’re not having conversations to understand one another. Someone is a bigot because of the programmes they have been conditioned with. If we don’t try to understand this, how can we then try to change this? Instead we shun, and this further alienates us.

It’s DANGEROUS this tribal mentality. Because people are afraid to speak out against the tribe. To not rock the boat. So we all have the same opinion.


Enough is enough.

We all have different thoughts and opinions no matter what we “label” ourselves. We should start celebrating having differing conversations, so we can not only understand, but be understood.

I have learnt the importance of this in my own family, where we are totally divided politically. But I still love them no matter what. We still have CONVERSATIONS and I learn a lot about “the other side”.

In her TED talk, Celeste Headlee talks about 10 Ways To Have Better Conversation. The most important I think is to LISTEN.

All to often we converse with the intent to be heard, without hearing the other person. We wait for our turn to speak. We are in our heads instead of actually listening. And we are creating a divide so deep in society I fear unless we all actively start trying to communicate we will continue to go deeper in this trajectory.

Everyone has a story and knowledge to share, and we are cutting ourselves off from learning and bonding by branding people with a fucking all-or-nothing label.

It’s a tragedy y’all.

Go out. Talk to people. Listen to people. And most importantly, be prepared to be amazed.

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